In this society we are inundated with messages of love. Whether it the love of Jesus, valentine, romance, girlfriend/boyfriend we see it everywhere. But what does love really mean, why did God create love? And how does our capacity to love relate to worship of God.
In the Islamic tradition we are required to love Allah the most, followed by his Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him) and then our parents. If you ask most Muslims about who they love most, they will recite the order given above, but do they truly love in that order? Sometimes we deceive our brains in thinking that this is the order we love our creator and his creation, but our hearts tell a different story.
Why am I suddenly asking all these questions? I am finally going through the process of marriage and I have finally found my significant other who means a lot to me. Since I am already going through an expansion of heart and gaining a deeper understanding of what love is I decided to tackle all the assumptions I have about my love to my Creator and his Prophet and to truly deepen my love to my Allah and Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him).
To help me in this quest, I decided to buy a book called the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. In this book the author tells us that there are five languages of love that we communicate with others (he directs at one spouse) and that each person has their own language of love. To have a successful marriage we must master the love language of our spouse and express to her/him our love in her/his language.
I found it fascinating that the five languages of love actually reminded me of the five pillars of Islam and other acts of worship in Islam. Chapman’s first language of love was Words of Affirmation, which reminded me of our first pillar of Islam, declaration of faith and worship in God and his Messenger. Also, all the praises to God that we should do constantly go under this category. The second language was Quality Time, which reminded me of our five daily prayers plus the recommended nightly prayers. Gifts were the third language and that reminded me of Zakat and charity; the Prophet taught us that even a smile to a stranger is charity. Number four was Physical Touch and that reminded me of fasting where we stop eating, drinking and intimate relations with our spouse for a whole month (when the sun is up). Lastly Acts of Service, reminded me of the pilgrimage we all have to do at least once in our lifetime and the many smaller Umrah that we try to do in between.
I have just started reading the book and I am not sure if each of the languages will fit each of the pillars of worship, but I guess we will all have to find out 🙂
My intentions for reading the book is to become a better husband and partner. It is also to become better at worshipping my Creator who has blessed me in so many ways.