The List of the Forgotten


Ever feel that for some reason you are always out of the loop, well read on this might be for you. In this busy network of life one usually finds himself on the list of “to be informed” or “not to be informed” unless you are like me on a third list of the forgotten. Being on this list means that we get the benefits of neither, people assume we know so we don’t get the benefit of being considered ignorant. While at the same time we are not informed, so we also miss out on the benefit of being in the loop.

I recently found out that I was on the third list and recent events that have transpired have further confirmed it for me beyond the shadow of a doubt. Before I begin the story, let me give you a quick backdrop. I have two sisters in my home country that I depend on providing me news and updates about my extended family. I am also engaged/married depending on how you define marriage (and you thought life was that easy).

A couple weeks back I call my sister to tell her about a certain dream I had. To make things short I basically had a dream of my first child and what her name will be. After I told my sister the dream, she told me that she got to name my Aunt’s son based on a dream she had about him. Wait a minute; my Aunt had a son I respond in shock. To which she replies, yes a few month ago, didn’t anyone tell you. Now if this the first time I called my sister that fine I guess. But I call her about once a week, plus I am also in weekly contact with my other sister who lives in the same building as my Aunt!!! Now, if my whole family in the US and I all did not know it would be okay, but it turns out I am the only one that did not have a clue about anything! After that she gives me a string of surprises and updates and helped me come to the realization that I am squarely on the forgotten list.

Small events here and there kept bringing and confirming my place on this third list of the almost non-existent, but only the events of today prompted me to write this blog of protest. The irony of all this is that one could almost call me a news addict. I love reading news and I am constantly checking it and reading it all day yet I find myself extremely uninformed about my own family.

Okay so what happened today to warrant such a blog? Well, to start it all off I had this nice but quick conversation with my brother about nothing relevant to this blog. Thirty minutes later, my brother’s good friend (and mine too) decides to open his gmail chat box and send me a quick “How you doing?” I respond and we start a fun conversation (by our standards), until he suddenly tells me that he can’t believe that my family is moving further south. Moving? I inquire. Yes he tells me, I deduced it from your brother’s conversation with me and he confirmed it with me yesterday.  My head is now going through a complete spiral, I just left home four days ago and will be back in eight more days. When did this happen? To make it worse, I just spoke to my brother not even thirty minutes ago and he did not mention or hint at anything! I jokingly tell my friend that it confirmed I am on this list of the forgotten and I wonder what surprises will I find on my wedding day.

But, wait don’t close your browser yet, because the story is not done yet. Four hours later I get a call from my brother-in-law (my sister’s husband). I found this very surprising, because he usually never calls me, well at least not on Friday at 6:30PM. Anyway, he asks for my father-in-law phone number and I reply sure no problem and start the process of locating it. In my mind I am thinking thats nice, he is probably going to invite him for dinner just as my father-in-law invited us all to dinner last weekend. Casually, I ask him so why do you want the number. I want to talk to him he replies. Okay that was very helpful I think but reply I am just wondering what do you want to talk to him about? I want to talk to him about your fiancé? My fiancé?! Here I am imagining all random scenarios, is he going to complain, give advice, what going on? Yes, don’t you know your fiancé got into a car accident he finally informs me. Accident?! What when where, what are you talking about? And you basically got the story; I was out of the loop again. This time regarding my wife, wow, I am firmly on the forgotten list.  Here is how bad it is, my brother-in-law probably found out from my sister, who found out from my parents, who found out from her parents, who found out when the car failed to show up. How did I get skipped over? Shouldn’t I be there somewhere between my parents and her parents? Btw I am not looking for answers; I just find my predicament funny and just wanted to share it with everyone. Hopefully I can give you something to laugh about and maybe get/give some sympathy.

BTW Alhamdullah, my wife is in good condition and nothing bad happened, but regardless, this is a very good excuse and reason for you to keep my family and I in your duaa and prayers

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3 responses

  1. May Allah reward you patience 🙂

    1. I mean for always being left out of the loop!

  2. Hahaha.

    MashAllah Salah you are always optimistic. 😀

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